Get up to speed. He and She are out Who knows what’s in

The American Language Has Become a Foreign Language to Adults

I have to credit my Facebook friend David Rye as the inspiration for this story. Here is my contribution to his thoughts.

There is a real danger in America. No, I’m not talking about Biden or Trump.

I’m talking about the danger that if you don’t keep up with language changes, you’ll be quickly left behind speaking a language no one but you can understand.

Why Not Call Things What They Are?

When did movie previews become trailers? Aren’t they opposites? Don’t previews come at the beginning and a trailer at the end?

We park in driveways and drive on parkways. What’s up with that?

If that girl is really bad — she’s good? If I’m down with something I’m actually up for it?

I have issues. No, you don’t.

You have what used to be referred to as problems. You have problems, not issues.

Admit it — get help. Find a good 12-step program that helps with your problems — not your issues.

Why Not Call Things What They Used to Be?

Do you still look for needles in haystacks even though haystacks are as rare as hen’s teeth these days?

Hen’s teeth would be rare but who noticed how rare they were?

Do I sound like a broken record? Should I update and sound like a broken CD? Not sure that will ever catch on. Broken 8-track?

If you’re toast does that mean you’re well bread? Sorry, couldn’t help it.

Political Correctness

The terms Boys and Girls are officially out at a Lincoln Nebraska school. These nouns are now verboten in the educational lexicon.

Kids could be referred to as Purple Penguins. With the school boards blessing.

“The school also provides teachers with information to prevent kids from getting bullied on the playground. They suggest teaching kids to use phrases like, “Please respect my privacy” and “Hey, they’re called ‘private parts’ for a reason.”

Yes sir, that kind of tough talk should definitely dissuade the playground bullies.”

You can’t make this stuff up.

Society seems hellbent on disarming our children’s very being. Identities are gone.

Ridiculous so called politically correct terms replace he and she with the blessing of elitists across the land.

If there’s any way for society to go off the deep end — it does. And takes as many Lemmings as possible along with them.

And if you don’t put your stamp of approval on these new rules then there’s something seriously wrong with you. You clearly have issues.

If only the world were as simple as when I was a child. Parents didn’t talk in euphemisms.

There was no timeout to think about what you did wrong.

There were no child psychologists unless you want to hang that moniker on Mom.

How have we come so far yet gained so little?

You’d think we’d have spent the last 50 years simplifying things not making them more complicated.

Which of the following do you prefer?

The shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

Or, if two relative points are to be connected to each other then the preferred method is to use a line of undetermined width that does not deviate in any direction in its travel and attempt to come into contact with the second point without pursuing beyond or past said second point.

We talk more and say less.

Some Final Thoughts

Have we learned nothing from KISS — Keep It Simple Stupid?

Perhaps being out of touch with all these changes would just be a saner, simpler, place. Let me know if you’re down with me.

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