Me, Life and 2022 Walked Into a Bar

I always thought I have figured out everything that might be required to consider for my short term goals to come true. I always thoughts, all life need is a well thought out map or plans and stuff. 2022 proved me wrong. Though it was a very rough year I can't deny it has given me plenty of reasons to be grateful for.

2022 was one of the most dynamic years to come my way. This year I ended my school life. From making friends to farewell party everything changed. I've had few very crappy school years and years full of opportunities. Blessed with the best set of teachers and friends who made my tough school days seem bearable. I started planning my future since 6th standard....by 8th I was very confident that I despised mathematics(I HATE THAT SUBJECT AND I BELIEVE THE FEELING IS MUTUAL AND HASN'T CHANGE SINCE 7TH GRADE) and would certainly persue English as my sole subject in future. Then I accidentally fell in love with chemistry in 10th standard and studied science for two more years. Then again I started preparing myself to persue academic line of study in future with the subjects I love. I got the opportunities to get into the best colleges in India with the subjects I opted for, (only the last step of admission procedure was left) but considering everything that was at stake,the decision didn't seem quiet right so here I am an ENGINEER in making. Engineering is that stream of study that has never ever crossed my mind but it is my reality now. And believe me for the last 2-3months of college I have been studying and trying to make friends and failing miserably so it isn't much different from my school life....LoL.

Moral of the story is no matter how much effort you put into your planning even your backup plans can fall short infront of what life has already planned for you, no matter how close you are to achieving your dreams it can always slip. I have been overly stressed (without any external pressure) since 8th standard, it all started becoming more and more serious with every passing day and now it is recognized as my anxiety disorder, the reason to my phobias, and many more. My entire growing up got messed up because I was always way too serious.

So this year I learnt it's okay to cut some slack because these days aren't coming back anytime soon, actually it's never coming back. It's okay to have socializing issues doesn't mean you should stop trying. It's okay to seek help, you don't have to be equipped with multiple back up plans all by yourself because you have a hunch the real one is going to blow up. It's okay to feel left out as long as you know what you seek and can be happy all by yourself. Acceptance of defeat or failure and learning from it, is probably the first step towards real success or victory. Everything and everyone in one's life is transitory what's the point in stressing then. Being slave to the self created tormentor is doing no good. Freedom it is what everyone seeks all their lives the path to it is different and unique. My mom suggested is should start writing down my quirky psychological disorders 'cause that's my way to freedom...hmmnn maybe I will. What's yours?(give it a thought).

●Don't stress beyond breaking point. Be the reason of your own happiness.Face life head on. Accept failure and learn from it. Study for the sake of knowledge.HAVE FUN AND BE HAPPY. Because the years ahead are just going to get harder so living in the moment would be a wise choice(I don't imply that one should become completely ignorant of their future....I just mean not to become so invested that you start living in future tense.)