Entry 6: Death to My Ego!

Dear Diary,

I always get here, this point where I start to have epiphanies and start setting goals. I start back working out and I have all of these goals and aspirations that I want to tackle. And then it goes flat, maybe one too many obstacles occur, or I just become daunted by the process, but this wave of energy never lasts for long. So now that I stand at this point in my journey for the umpteenth time, I'm desperate for a way to do it differently.

In past entries it's quite clear that I have a lot of thoughts and opinions when it comes to myself. Whether positive or negative I believe that my ego is a lot of what leads to my downfall. I either have too little, which is where I become depressed and tell myself that I'm a loser who will never succeed. Or I have too much, where I treat myself like this prodigy, a virtuoso who can accomplish anything, just for a setback to occur and I'm back to the low point. I think it's time for something new.

I want to strip myself down, take away ego completely and decide who am I even without importance, without purpose. So much of our lives can be dictated by how important we want to be. Trying to become the CEO of that company, trying to be liked by that group of friends, I'm done with that. I am not important, so then who am I. Or, more importantly, who do I want to be. I'll be exploring that for the next couple of entries Diary, so I hope you're prepared! But, for now, thank you for listening!

Sincerely,