Entry 17: Suffering Is a choice...

Dear Diary,

I've whined to you for a long time now, screaming at the wind for some type of life changing epiphany that will make right every flaw I believe I have. After so much whining though, I do have to come to some conclusion as the common denominator in all of the chaos that I perceive as my life. I'm a victim, and I'm not saying that as a cold hard fact, I'm a victim, because that is the mindset I've used as a coping mechanism for years. It helps to absolve me of responsibility.

I'm turning a certain age this year (I won't say how old lol) and lately with new goals and objectives I've tried to reach I'm realizing just how much responsibility success takes. I don't know why for so long I convinced myself that the world owed me something, or that someone would come along and save me from my fate, but the truth is that I have to save myself by being more proactive in my life. Always playing the victim put me on the bench of my own game, I've been sitting on the sidelines and just watching it pass me by, but it's time for me to suit up and get in the game.

They say that pain happens, which is true, life has its ups and downs, however suffering is a choice. I've interpreted this to mean that even though bad things happen, it is our decision to dwell on them and drag it with us as baggage throughout life. I'm getting older, I'm getting wiser, and I'm making different decisions. If suffering is a choice, so is happiness, and that's what I choose. Thank you for listening Diary, I'll talk to you again soon!

Sincerely,