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Emotions on the Go
19 days ago
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Emotions on the Go

Ferrara, 30 October 2019, 7:30 a.m

The sound of the alarm began to invade the bedroom.

It was not the usual melody, I immediately realised.

Stunned, I widened my eyes and glanced at the phone screen, it showed: “departure for Melbourne”. I immediately realised: “ today is a special day “.

A brief moment of reflection followed as I leaned out of the window’s room admiring the sky and the surrounding landscape, almost as if I wanted to fix an image that I had no idea of when I could have seen again. It lasted a few minutes but it was really intense.

The idea of leaving excited me a lot but frightened me even more, so it was a really profound moment.

I regained consciousness and continued with the usual morning routine, despite a big lump in my throat was present in every little action.

Time was running faster than usual that morning so, in the blink of an eye, we were already slammed into the car.

Direction: airport.

On the way I pretended to be happy-go-lucky and carefree while, in reality, an anguished silence was proliferating within me.

Once at the airport, there was little time left before departure. We had a short breakfast, a few last jokes and the fateful goodbyes arrived.

I walked towards the security checkpoints by visually photographing the faces of my family with the eyes of a boy who was still little grown and immersed in his insecurities.

As I completed the checks, their gazes vanished and a few minutes were separating me from take-off, from my first intercontinental flight and one of my biggest dreams: that to explore the land of kangaroos, Australia.

And I left. Incredulous that this was really happening.

I immediately made that trip my own because only the departure left me with a thousand emotions in a single stroke. Immediately a strong nostalgia began to prevail and I started rummaging in my backpack looking for an old gift from my sister: a small globe.

I am very attached to this object; she had given it to me several years earlier with a small dedication that quoted: “this will be useful to you when you realise your dream of going to Australia, so you will always have a piece of me with you”. To this day it is present in all my adventures.

Ransacking through the luggage, I found another gift that she had secretly slipped in: a book by Bill Bryson entitled “in a sunburnt country, Australia”.

I smiled and was excited to read the dedication inside.

She always knows how to surprise people.

Now a strong root bound me to her and to my family. At that moment I immediately felt stronger and ready to face that adventure.

(You can find the translation of the dedication in English in the comments section below)

I slowly swallowed the chagrin that was taking over my emotions, put on a pair of headphones and pressed play.

With the notes floating around in my head I looked out the window of the aircraft and, for the first time that morning, took a look into the future.

For the first time I began to reflect on who I was becoming, rather than where I was going.

Moscow Airport, 30 October 2019, 5:15 p.m

First stop of an interminable flight.

Russia welcomed me with a blizzard, which made me very excited as I was expecting about thirty-five degrees in Melbourne.

This excitement, alas, lasted only a few hours. I foolishly missed boarding my second flight and, at that point, a heavy weight hit me.

I couldn’t believe it, it seemed calculated.

What had been a dream now seemed to have become more of an obsession.

I somehow managed not to despair, but I was very worried and angry with myself for that small mistake that had almost cost me the whole trip.

In my eyes it was a failure because I could never forgive myself for seeing my dream vanish simply because I had missed a flight.

My previous experiences, however, had taught me a very important lesson: there is a solution, always.

And so it was. A couple of hours later an identical flight would leave.

It was one of those pieces of news that warms your heart.

I got excited and took care to take a seat a few metres from the boarding gate. I was glued to that chair until departure. And I left.

Now only the last stopover remained before I could finally make my dream come true.

Bangkok Airport, 31 October 2020, 8:20 a.m.

It was a good forty degrees here to welcome me.

Call me crazy but this is the climate I prefer so I was immediately persuaded by a shiver of euphoria.

Ten hours were waiting for me before I could leave before I could leave… what do you do, don’t you explore the city a bit?

A true traveller seizes every opportunity and, indeed, I went to wander around the centre of Bangkok.

Although I had plenty of time available, I took extra care this time and allowed myself only six hours before returning to the airport.

Those were enough to visit a few temples and accumulate some souvenirs, then I was ready to leave.

It was a short visit but I was fascinated by that city.

Now, however, I was buzzing: the journey began to be long and I couldn’t wait to land in that special corner of the world, Australia.

Once again, I gathered my emotions and boarded them on the plane. Together we took off for Melbourne.

Melbourne Airport, 01 November 2019, 10:30 a.m

I even remember the first background song that greets you upon landing a flight: ‘Dance Monkey’ by Tones and I. Not that I’m a fan of this music, mind you, but it explains how careful I was to catch every little detail.

I remember the first thing I did when I got off the plane was to go to the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror and burst into tears.

It was a cry of joy, endless joy. I couldn’t believe it was all real.

After the tedious checks I was finally able to breathe the Melbourne air and, this time, it was not the heat that surprised me.

I hadn’t slept for two days but at that moment I felt more awake than ever.

I jumped on the bus that would take me to the city centre and immediately began to admire the surrounding landscapes.

Everything was magic in my eyes, everything tasted different.

I admired the tufts of grass, the shrubs, the road signs… It was the simplest things that left their mark on me.

Being able to finally realise that my dream had come true made me feel more alive than ever.

Another thrill of euphoria then swept over me.

This time, however, that thrill was more like a storm. And this blizzard of euphoria lasted a whole year …

I arrived at my destination and reached the mattress in the bedroom and, still bright-eyed, took one last look at the Australian sky before falling asleep and only blinking again the next morning with a different spirit.

The spirit of someone who wants to enjoy life in every little moment.

I had never been able to savour life so much.

That is the thing I am most grateful for: not having wasted even half a second of my life over there.

It has been the most incredibly happy and fulfilling year of my life and it fills me with joy to be able to say I have found my happy place in the world.

I wish infinitely that the same could happen to you. Your existence will change and you will not regret it at all!

© Alex Negrini — Be Adventurer, 2021

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