Believe it or not, it is like that
Photo by Aldebaran S on Unsplash
It is amusing that when people achieve the biggest mental strength they think they have mastered, they fall sick physically for a long time. It is a sign that “It will not always be like that.”
Prologue
I summarize one story that I re-read when times are challenging. There was a rich man that lost everything. He went to the sea to drown himself when he met a fisherman. The rich man told his story to the fisherman, and the fisherman wrote him on a piece of paper: “It will not always be like that.” He gave the rich man this piece of paper and told him to go home and read it. The rich man went home and have read the letters. He found his courage and started anew from zero. The man became rich again and went to look for the wise fisherman, wanting to give him money for his advice. The fisherman recognized the man and told him: “Go back and re-read the piece of paper I gave you.” The rich man understood the meaning of the Wiseman words better. You got the picture, right?
Current post
Last week and a half, I was sick physically. I lay on my bed all day with a fever and the inability to breathe or sleep. I am not sure if this was Covid, Omnicron, or whatever, but it made me release many things I wasted my time on.
When people like me are way too confident they are free or overcame the last few months’ happenings, they forget about their physical health.
That is, indeed, what I did — fighting with my mental wounds from 6 months ago.
I did not give myself time to grieve, cry, and think from the fear to meet the ugly side of my broken life.
However, people always run away for a while until they find themselves again.
Usually, it happens when they face their fears face to face going to hell and back — it does not matter physically or emotionally.
When I thought I recollected my life’s pieces, I fell sick physically from the insults, pain, disappointments, work stress, and uncertainty of my current life. It took me a week to stand up again.
But, here I am, getting stronger and clearer with my goals.
Cutting ties with some things and people are also on my current situation table.
I had the time lying in my bed, I de-cluttered my mind, feelings, and expectations.
I saw the actions of people around me and their inactions. They are a form of action, after all.
So, I saw what was for me and what was not.
I am happy I found out, and this is why I cut ties with the places I write since they do not give me anything more than wasting my real-life time.
My motivation to write on social media drastically dropped since I did not see any reason for it.
Nobody cares if I am there or not, and if they care, I should write and lie daily to attract more attention? For real?
I will not do it.
I never was a spotlight person.
The things that indeed I will do, starting now, are:
*Write on Medium once a week. I feel lost in the clutter of boring referral money-making articles only for Medium users and that my writing does not give any value to the people because they just do not read it — it’s not cash-oriented, after all.
I will check the writers I follow, though.
*Simily, since I love it a lot, I will not renew my subscription there for now since it does not show my stories when I am not a paid member.
I continue to post my stories there just by habit.
*Quora is a curious place — I do not pay my subscription there since I quit the platform some time ago.
But, too many people want me to answer their questions and follow me — It is fascinating somehow.
Right said, there is the only place I see my writing values.
So, in the end, I do what I started to do before Medium, Simily, Quora, etc.
I will participate in writing contests, and I go for my blog.
By the way, I want to thank Pamela for giving me information about writing contests.
I am sure who is on my blog will read me and finds some value in what I wrote, even if there are only a few followers.
However, I like the writers I follow, and I will continue to read them.
For my Medium subscription, I may only use the authors I follow referral links to support them — it is a gesture of respect.
That respect is the missing point in writers’ works that make them quit writing if they do not feel appreciated.
Regarding my well-being and the Universe’s weird sense of humor, I am grateful I got sick to open my blinded eyes to see who is not around me and who cares indeed for me.
It does not matter how many people you sleep or connect with at the end of the day when you meet the sickness, you are alone, finding your courage to fight for physical and mental survival.
Thanks for reading. Be brave and courageous in your lives.