Have you ever heard about a person who became big without struggling in life? Me neither.
Dreams should always be big. We should show up each day with an open mind to achieve that dream. The keyword is: open mind. Most people sabotage big dreams because of wrong belief systems. They believe “common lies” about what it takes to “make it big” in life.
The problem with accepting those lies is that they lead to two bad outcomes —- frustration and procrastination. There are two steps to overcoming these lies:
#1 Learn to spot lies you tell yourself and accepting that they’re affecting your growth
#2 Train yourself to replace them with realistic, optimistic thoughts.
Believing in lies is so much easier than taking action.
The one who takes responsibility to rewire their brain is going to be the main character of their own reality.
#1 It will change”
Many things in life will change with time.
However, what we really want to change stays the same. Yet these are the things that truly matter: our daily routines, the crappy boss, our financial condition — just to name a few.
These things won’t change with time; they require effort.
If you don’t ask for better treatment, the boss is less likely to do so.
If you never track expenses and create an action plan to improve your financial situation, it’ll stay the same.
Many things will change. You age, you tolerate more, but crucial improvements happen only when you change it yourself.
Don’t wait for change. Be the change yourself.
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#2 I need to find my purpose.”
Our lives are designed to waste years on learning about “purpose” by snobby education systems. And then fill our inner void with hyper-inflated motivation videos instead of taking action and working.
None of these scenarios help because the preaching of having a “purpose” in order to succeed in life is false. Defining and figuring out a purpose isn’t easy.
While some people might find their purpose in life, they are a minority. The rest of us here have to “design” our purpose.
You shouldn’t be looking for your purpose and hold yourself back until you find one. You have to take action and make an impact.
Sometimes, you need to try out different things in order to figure out what you’re good at.
To make it big in life, you have to try out different things first.
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#3. It was easier for them.”
Most people waste their life looking for excuses to feel sorry for themselves.
They complain that life is easier for others and they deserve more. This is the most convincing lie we all tell ourselves.
Life might indeed be easier for someone else, but life is even more worse for some of the others too. You can’t influence any of those people’s privileges or miseries. All you can do is focus on yourself by making the most of what you’ve got on your plate.
If you’re always complaining about other people's advantages, you won’t have the time nor the mental energy to change your own life.
Comparing kills your confidence and blinds you from the opportunities you have in your life.
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#4. I don’t know where to start.”
We are surrounded by hundreds of opportunities every single day.
In fact, it’s more likely that you have too many options to choose from rather than “none.”
The reason you procrastinate is not because you don't know where to start, but because you are afraid to fail or embarrass yourself.
You don’t need to know the entire map to get started. Just take one small step and then another. It’s obviously okay and normal to get things wrong. It’s part of learning.
If you think you’ll wait until you “take a course” or “start later,” you're actually pushing off your turn.
We spend one-third of our lifetime sleeping, and a third on trivial activities like shopping, eating, cleaning, etc.
Thinking you can put off your chance today and hope for the next is the biggest lie that can turn into one of the biggest regrets in life.
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#5. It’s not my fault.”
Blaming others is easy, but it won’t take you any close to achieving your goals.
Whenever you choose to blame others for whatever the reason is, instead of taking action, you are only multiplying the misery in your life. Which becomes your fault.
The environment and world shaped your past, but who is in charge of “the now”?
You are in charge of creating reality now. And everytime you get a chance to do something differently but you choose to avoid it … you are losing your freedom.
If you want to get better, change an aspect in your life, you need to use the resources available to you and make the most out of your time.
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#6. I’ll be happy when I have X.”
The one who isn’t grateful of the present life as it is, won’t be able to enjoy the life once they have “more”
Having “more” or having an X thing won’t change your life. You’ll move on and you’ll need something else after that. The cycle of need never stops.
Most people are only fooling themselves by thinking that they’ll be happy once you have something or when a certain situation changes.
It won’t matter.
What will matter though is your mindset —- your ability to focu on the things you’re grateful for, even when difficulties arise.
#7. I don’t have time.”
We are always busy. But what exactly are we doing? We have no answer to that.
Do you have time to watch Netflix in the evenings?
Do you have time to scroll Shorts during your lunch break?
Do you know how many hours you spend doing nothing?
We deceive ourselves by saying we don’t have time.
Busy doesn't mean you’re living your life to the fullest. Busy doesn't mean you’re fulfilling your dreams. Busy is sometimes just a way to escape the truth.
And if you are always stressed and overwhelmed with work, it’s a sign that you’re lacking time-management skills.
We can make a way to prioritize what we want to do, if it’s important. And if it’s not important, then, you need to say that “I have other priorities” instead of saying “I don't have time.”
The truth is you can’t really “have time”. You have to make time and energy to do the things you want to do.
Nobody will give you more time.
If you don’t have time today, you probably won’t have it tomorrow, or next week, or the next month. So stop blaming it on time. Be honest to yourself instead.
Ask yourself specifically about a project, task or even a particular person … Are they really worth your time at all?
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#8. I(t) need(s) to be perfect.”
Perfection is a myth. If you’re waiting for something to be perfect, you’re likely to be just procrastinating.
But what is even perfect? On what basis do you label something perfect?
Even Pablo Picasso had done over 50,000 paintings in his lifetime. Out of which probably some of them just suck. It’s bold of us to think that what we do needs to be perfect and nothing less.
Perfection is nothing more than an excuse to delay time instead of finally accepting it.
If you wait until you look perfect, work perfect, you are avoiding the blame. You are scared of being wrong or mediocre, and hoping to delay hurt and truth. But the delay is making you suffer. We are all mediocre when we start, so why care about something that is inevitable.
Healthy growth involves mistakes, and criticism. When you are internally focused and give “the best as you can”, and letting go of perfection and “what will people think” mindset — you’ll see how open the world is for you.
You can never be brave enough to do something if you care what people think.
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#9. I’ll do it tomorrow.”
Let’s be honest here: Will you really do it tomorrow?
Tomorrow turns into someday, which will eventually turn into never.
The problem with delaying action is that you’ll find reasons to delay it even more. You are more likely to give it up entirely.
There’s no “perfect time” to start a new diet or start your new passion project. The first of January is just a day out of 365 days. Make yourself accept that you can start something any day of the year.
If it’s something you care about, you need to act on it now instead of waiting for more time to pass.
The sooner you start, the sooner you’ll see the results.
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#10. I know what I’m doing.”
“Do you know what you’re doing” or “do you think you know what you’re doing?”
Nobody ever knows everything. We learn as we grow? Yes. Can we teach ourselves about something? Definitely.
But, do we know everything? Probably not.
And thinking that you already know everything is pure arrogance and it is only blocking you from actual learning. Even the things we do everyday can be done better by learning and reading about it.
There’s nothing more convenient than asking people for help. Get advice from those who have done what you’re trying to do, those who are ahead of you in the journey.
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By trying to solve a problem on your own, you’re likely wasting a lot of time, energy and money.
Consider being selective about whom to ask advice from, but be even more cautious of your ego.
The reality is that we all change throughout our lives, regardless of how we’ve been born.
Being close-minded is your responsibility, if it’s stopping you from growing. By the time you debunk these lies, you’ve already lost your chance to become the best version of yourself and make it big.
What we should do instead is always reflect on your past, present, and future and strive to become the best version of yourself.
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